If I Fear Anything

Not knowing what is at its end and what is at its beginning makes me wonder what becomes of a man who has reached fifty and still has so much to do.

I have yet to fulfill my destiny what with so much time dithered away chasing the evangelical God and slipping up the company ladder and wallowing in an unsatisfying marriage - all for far too long.

I have yet to achieve my magnum opus, my landmark achievement, my personal masterpiece, the thing that, when I'm gone, someone will observe and say, "yes, he was really here."

Perhaps my fear - if I fear anything - is that when the fulfillment of it begins, the life left in me to achieve it will be at the beginning of its end.

Time, I now understand, is both the giver and conqueror of dreams.